Episode 1: The Curse of Lampy The Troll
Will wishes his parents would leave him alone and that is exactly what happens when he lands on Lampy's cousin. Lampy's a really angry garden troll who shrinks Will's family. As long as Will is badly behaved, his family will remain small but if he behaves himself they will start to grow. He doesn't need them - not yet, not until the food goes scarce and people starting asking questions. If he is to survive ,he's got to really behave himself and get his family back. It's just, that being good is not as easy as it looks, nor is listening to Lampy's 'Manure Song'.Always, always, watch what you wish for and never, ever, flatten any trolls.
ext = exterior shot
int = interior shot
BLACK SCREEN
This is inside the mouth of 10 year old WILL SQUIRE and he’s trying to scream.
When he lets rip, we are blown backwards.
WILL (V.O.) (voice over)
AAHHH!!!!!
EXT. HOUSE. HALLWAY - DAY
His voice is now working but he’s still frozen to the spot.
WILL’S MUM (O.C.) (off camera)
William. It’s Great Aunt Jemima. Comb your hair, at least.
Light blue touch paper and Will’s off.
He’s up the stairs, along the corridor and in the front door of his bedroom. The door has all the usual tat on it ‘keep out’, ‘ Parents not welcome’
Inside is a second door and this has a combination lock on it. The door is painted to look like a safe. On this door it says ‘Danger Area’. ‘Dangerous to parents - you have been warned’,’Beware of the Killer Robots’.
BEDROOM
Will opens this door very, very careful as just inside is a booby trap. Squeezing through the crack in the door, he reaches the safety of his bed.
Above the bed is a large poster of Will’s main man, Simon Cowell.
EXT. HOUSE - DAY
It’s an old rambling house and like Aunt Jemima, it’s seen better days. You can almost smell the mothballs as she stops at the bottom of the stairs, leading up to the front door.
Aunt Jemima looks up.
AUNT JEMIMA
William. I’m here and I’m ready for a great big kiss.
Aunt Jemima’s over-painted lips are puckered.
In a corner of the garden, a high-pitched GIGGLING from the undergrowth.
INT. HOUSE. WILL’S BEDROOM - DAY
Will is pressing himself as flat as possible against the wall as he attempts to look at the monster downstairs.
WILL
She’s got a beard now.
EXT. HOUSE - DAY
Aunt Jemima is welcomed at the door by WILL’S MUM. She’s lovely.
In the same corner of the garden is SCUTTLING and more GIGGLING; it’s moving nearer to the front of the house - under Will’s bedroom, to be exact.
INT. HOUSE. WILL’S BEDROOM - DAY
Will is talking to his own robot monster, ‘Si Borg’, which is made up of loads of rubbish things that grown-ups throw away.
WILL
On the list. Si?
Will makes Si Borg nod.
On the wall is a big sheet of paper entitled: “Grown Ups to Be Turned Into Robots”. He grabs a big felt pen and adds Aunt Jemima’s name, just below ‘MRS BALFOUR - MY TEACHER’, ‘MY PARENTS’ and ‘JIMMY’ written about 20 times.
KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!
WILL’S MUM (O.S.) (off screen)
William. Come out this instant. Aunt Jemima’s got something for you.
WILL
(to himself)
I bet she has.
WILL’S MUM (O.S.)
I’ll get your brother to break the door down again.
INT. HOUSE. OUTSIDE WILL’S BEDROOM - DAY
Will’s Mum is pressing her ear against the door. In frustration, she moves away.
At the other end of the hall is JIMMY, 15 (the EVIL ONE) and Will’s brother. He is ready to attack the door.
WILL’S MUM
(to Jimmy)
Go ahead.
Jimmy charges along the landing and runs at the door. He bounces back very quickly - in pain.
JIMMY
He’s reinforced it.
INT. HOUSE. WILL’S BEDROOM - DAY
WILL
I’ve reinforced it, Si. But it won’t be long until they try to assimilate us. I may need an escape route.
Will holds Si up to his ear.
WILL (CONT’D)
Good idea Si
.
Will places Si on the table.
WILL (CONT’D)
You prepare to attack any boarders.
Will opens his bedroom window. It’s a bit too high to jump. Between the window and a tree WAS a big branch. On the tree where the branch was is a badly painted sign: “I CUT YOUR TREE BRUV”.
Will sits on the window ledge. There is the sound of an electric drill outside the door.
Will spots a big bush under his window but several feet down. He is reluctant to jump until his brother dashes through his bedroom door.
Will jumps on to the bush.
EXT. HOUSE - DAY
There is a high pitched SCREAM from under the bush.
WILL
What was that?
LAMPY (O.C.)
You’ve killed my cousin, fatso.
WILL
What?
LAMPY (O.C.)
You’ve flattened Wilbur.
WILL
Who’s there?
LAMPY (O.C.)
Speak to me Wilbur.
WILL
Who said that?
LAMPY (O.C.)
Me, you great fat brute.
WILL
Are you a girl?
LAMPY (O.C.)
Do I sound like a girl?
WILL
Yes, actually.
Upstairs, and hanging out of Will’s bedroom window is Jimmy - covered in whatever was in the booby trap.
JIMMY
There he is. He’s in the bushes.
Aunt Jemima rushes out the front door.
AUNT JEMIMA
Have you hurt yourself, my little William?
Suddenly she STOPS; as in, frozen to the spot. Lifeless.
WILL
Aunt Jemima?
Will gets up from the bush and pokes Aunt Jemima’s face. She is motionless.
LAMPY (O.C.)
I did that.
WILL
It’s brilliant.
LAMPY (O.C.)
Is it?
WILL
Where are you?
LAMPY (O.C.)
Standing next to my flat cousin, Wilbur. The one you sat on.
WILL
Come out.
LAMPY (O.C.)
Only if your promise not to sit on me.
WILL
Why would I sit on you?
LAMPY (O.C.)
Tell that to Wilbur.
WILL
It was an accident.
LAMPY (O.C.)
That what all you big people say.
(imitating)
‘It was an accident’, ‘I didn’t mean to step on your Dad’. ’I’m sorry I flattened your cousin’.
It won’t wash I’m afraid. You’re going to have to be punished.
WILL
Says who?
LAMPY (O.C.)
The Council Of Garden Trolls.
WILL
The Council Of Garden Trolls? You made that up.
LAMPY (O.C.)
No I didn’t.
WILL
How many of you are there, in the Council of thingymy?
LAMPY, the troll, comes out from under the bush.
LAMPY
Well there was two of us but now there’s only one.
Will is a bit stunned at the look of Lampy The Troll.
WILL
Who are you? What are you?
LAMPY
I’m a troll.
WILL
A what?
LAMPY
A troll.
WILL
Why are you in my garden?
LAMPY
Oh, it’s your garden is it? It makes no difference, I suppose, that my family have been living here for hundreds of years?
WILL
So why haven’t I seen you before?
LAMPY
Trolls are shy.
WILL
Trolls are ugly.
Lampy starts to cry but is watching Will through his fingers.
LAMPY
You killed my cousin and then you called me ugly. Lampy isn’t ugly.
Will looks at frozen Aunt Jemima, thinks about it, nods his head, deciding this troll could be useful.
WILL
Okay, I’m sorry, Lampy.
LAMPY
No, you’re not.
WILL
I am.
LAMPY
How sorry?
WILL
Loads.
LAMPY
I’ve still got to punish you, it’s the troll law.
WILL
What are you going to do? Beat up my cat?
LAMPY
Nope. I’m going to do the worst thing a troll can do.
WILL
Bite me in the ankles?
LAMPY
Are you being sarcastic?
WILL
Just telling it like it is.
LAMPY
Right then, you’ve asked for it.
A huge seismic movement and then silence.
WILL
Is that it?
LAMPY
You don’t know what I did.
WILL
Don’t care.
LAMPY
You will.
INT. HOUSE. LOUNGE - DAY
It looks like a high grassed savannah but it’s actually the front room carpet.
Will’s Mum, Brother and DAD are now just tall enough to see over the top of the carpet pile.
Shell-shocked would probably be too mild a word. Dad looks at Mum.
WILL’S MUM/WILL’S DAD
WILLIAM!
However if we look at them from normal height, all we can hear is ‘Mickey-Mouse-on-helium’ voices.
EXT. GARDEN - DAY
Will’s CAT picks up Aunt Jemima by the collar. She’s moving again but she’s a whole lot smaller than she was.Will watches in silence until his cat disappears into the bushes.
WILL
That mouse looked like Aunt Jemima.
LAMPY
Told you, you wouldn’t like it.
WILL
You mean you’ve shrunk Aunt Jemima?
LAMPY
I am the dark lord of the garden.
WILL
That’s brilliant.
LAMPY
You’re not upset?
WILL
Upset? Upset? You’ve saved my life. Thank you.
Will is running around in circles, jumping and shouting for joy.
LAMPY
(to himself)
Not the reaction, I expected.
INT. HOUSE. LOUNGE - LATER
A HUGE, and I mean HUUUGE net, comes flying down on the carpet jungle.
Mum, Dad, and Brother are running all over the place to avoid being caught.
From above, the net is only Will and his trusty fishing net except this time he’s trying to entrap the squeaky people who are his family.
In order to escape, Will’s Mum,Dad and Jimmy run into the doll’s house.
Will lifts the house to look inside, then he lets it drop with a bump.
INT. DOLL’S HOUSE - DAY
Mum, Dad and Brother are being thrown about and attempting to miss the doll’s furniture flying all over the room.
INT. HOUSE. LOUNGE - CONTINUOUS
Will runs to a drawer and takes out the biggest roll of tape.
He tapes around and around and around the doll’s house, laughing as he does. Let’s face it, this family aren’t going anywhere.
LAMPY
Aren’t you the littlest bit upset?
WILL
I don’t like my family. All they ever do is make me do things.
Will runs up the stairs.
WILL (CONT’D)
Yeah!!!
Lumpy is trying his best to follow Will by climbing the stairs. Trolls don’t do stairs. Lumpy sits on a step and gives up.
INT. HOUSE. MUM AND DAD’S BEDROOM - CONTINUOUS
Will makes the biggest mess in the history of the world. He puts on his Dad’s best dinner jacket, his Mum’s best hat and then uses their bed as a trampoline.
This is all his Christmases rolled into one.
An idea strikes Will.
WILL
Jimmy’s room.
INT. HOUSE. HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS.
Will still dressed up to the nines runs to the door of Jimmy’s room.
It just says one word “DEATH”.
Will slowly opens the door looking for any booby traps. Nothing, zilch, not a thing...and inside.
INT. HOUSE. JIMMY’S ROOM - CONTINUOUS.
This is the first time in yonks that Will’s been in this room. It’s immaculate.
Everything is in its place.
WILL
He’s weirder than I thought.
Will knows what he’s looking for, his brother’s signed photo of Wayne Rooney. He takes it off the wall and runs out of the room.
INT. DOLL’S HOUSE - DAY
Jimmy sits outside the doll’s house, taped to a chair. He can’t move. His mouth is also taped over.
His midget brother sits helpless as Will starts drawing on the Wayne Rooney poster.
If Jimmy was full size, Will would be dead.
Lampy sits on the stairs, bemused.
INT. DOLL’S HOUSE - LATER
Dad is picking a hole in the tape through one of the windows. He’s using a large plastic hat stand.
Dad pokes his eye through the hole.
WILL’S MUM
What’s he doing?
WILL’S DAD
You’re not going to like it.
WILL’S MUM
Not going to like it? There’s not much about today, I do like.
WILL’S DAD
See for yourself.
Mum looks through the hole.
Jimmy is crying in the corner.
WILL’S MUM
He’s eating ice cream. I strictly forbade him. Will, stop that this instant.
Moving further from the house the voice gets higher, and squeaky Mickey Mouse is once again in the crib.
WILL’S MUM (CONT’D)
James please stop crying it’s very annoying. If we get out of this predicament then I promise you we will buy you another Shane Rooney poster. I can’t see Great Aunt Jemima.
JIMMY
I’ve never understood why you call her ‘great’, she’s not that great. Maybe if she’s been eaten, then she could be ‘Interesting but eaten’ Aunt Jemima.
Mum moves away from the hole.
WILL’S MUM
James!
JIMMY
I guess no one would eat old hairy face anyway.
WILL’S MUM
Father, please have a word with your son.
WILL’S DAD
Stop winding your mother up.
JIMMY
Maybe it’s not us that have gotten smaller, maybe Will’s got bigger.
And everything else in the house, I suppose? No. This is to do with William. I can smell him all over this. Some experiment that’s gone wrong , I shouldn’t wonder.
As Mum goes in to a rant, Jimmy mouths the same words.
WILL’S MUM (CONT’D)
Who has to pick up the pieces? I do. Who has to keep this family together? I do. No help. No support. I may as well do everything myself.
INT. HOUSE. LOUNGE - DAY
Will is slobbed out on the sofa. The room is a mess. Empty cola cans, crisp packets, ice cream tubs strewn everywhere.
Will is cutting out photos from a magazine. You know he’s concentrating because his tongue is sticking out.
One of the faces is of Will’s hero, Simon Cowell.
LATER
A large poster is hanging from the wall, it reads “WILLIAM’S GOT TALENT”.
Will’s Mum, Dad and Jimmy are sitting outside the Doll’s house - all of them taped to seats. They look like judges in a talent show.
Will’s Dad has Simon Cowell’s face with the eyes cut out stuck on his own face. Jimmy has a girl’s face stuck on his.
Will has drums made from upside down buckets, boxes and he’s making a racket.
Lampy has Rhubarb stuck in each of his ears.
WILL’S DAD
Who’s the funny looking guy?
WILL’S MUM
I told you that school was a waste of time. Especially when he’s bringing home people like that.
JIMMY
I don’t think he goes to Will’s school, Mum. Maybe he’s an alien.
WILL’S MUM
That’s right James. Just make things worse.
WILL’S DAD
The boy could have a point, dearest. It would explain a lot.
WILL’S MUM
What a racket.
WILL’S DAD
I don’t think our son is overly blessed with talent.
WILL’S MUM
That’s a horrid thing to say.
JIMMY
True ‘though. Except for making people smaller. He’s good at that. Can’t fault him there.
The cat walks in still carrying Aunt Jemima by the collar.
WILL’S MUM
Is that? My goodness it is. It’s Great Aunt Jemima.
JIMMY
(to himself)
Uneaten, so not very interesting.
The cat is scared by the drumming and beats a retreat with Aunt Jemima screaming in a high squeak.
WILL (O.C.)
(booming voice)
So what do you think? Simon? Dad, you’re Simon Cowell.
Dad attempts to give him a thumbs up even ‘though his arms are taped.
WILL (CONT’D)
Mum?
WILL’S MUM
Lovely dear. Really lovely.
WILL
Jimmy The Girl?
Will’s face comes right up to Jimmy’s girl mask.
WILL (CONT’D)
Well?
Will picks up Jimmy’s chair and turns him upside down. Will pulls the mask off Jimmy’s face.
Jimmy wants to cry but he forces a grimace.
WILL (CONT’D)
So, you’d all say I’m through to the next round?
Jimmy is placed the right way up again. Mum, Dad and Jimmy nod.
WILL (CONT’D)
Wicked.
(to Lampy)
Your turn.
Lampy is still on the stairs.
LAMPY
Don’t want to. Don’t get the point of it anyway.
WILL
It’s fun. Can’t you do things?
LAMPY
Like what?
WILL
What about playing a musical instrument? Don’t trolls have boy bands?
LAMPY
Now that you mention it, I can get a tune out of a spider’s web. Wilbur’s always.....
Will attempts to change the subject quickly.
WILL
Can’t you sing?
LAMPY
I used to sing at night by the light of the moon.
WILL
Sing.
LAMPY
I’m shy.
WILL
Go on.
LAMPY
Okay then.
WILL
Judges, all the way from the garden,it’s my friend, Lampy.
Lampy is about to sing when he stops.
LAMPY
You called me ‘your friend’.
WILL
Just sing.
Okay, he’s a troll but the wee man can hold a tune.
LAMPY
“I eats it in the morning, I eats in the night, I eats when I’m hungry, and eats it to be bright - Manure, manure, everybody loves manure...”
Lampy gets carried away and has broken into a tap dance.
WILL’S DAD
He’s actually quite good.
Will is upset with Lampy’s talent and is in a huff
WILL
I’m going upstairs to play with my brother’s computer.
Jimmy is grimacing at this news.
WILL (CONT’D)
I’d better stick them back in the house.
Mum, Dad and Jimmy are all nodding along to the Manure Song.
INT. HOUSE. JIMMY’S ROOM - DAY
Will is playing games on the computer and deleting files.
WILL
Oops, didn’t mean to delete that. Sorry, Bro.
Along the table is Jimmy, still taped to the chair and being forced to watch Will.
Jimmy is trying to struggle free. Lampy sits on the edge of the bed.
LAMPY
What’s that thing?
WILL
It’s a computer. Don’t trolls use them?
LAMPY
Don’t think so. Can you make manure with them?
WILL
Nope.
LAMPY
Then, no, we don’t.
WILL
Don’t you ever go home?
LAMPY
The garden’s my home.
WILL
Don’t you sleep?
LAMPY
Nope. That’s when trolls play. All those weird noises you hear in the garden at night, that’s us.
Will is concentrating on a computer game.
WILL
I’ve won.
Will throws his arms in the air knocking Jimmy off the table.
Will rolls to the floor and catches his brother before he’s splattered.
Will puts Jimmy back on the table but he’s broken the little chair as he’s now grown.
LAMPY
I forgot to tell you that bit. Every time you do a good deed, the troll curse weakens a little and your family gets bigger.
WILL
But I don’t want them to get bigger.
Will attempts to catch Jimmy who is hiding behind the computer.
WILL (CONT’D)
Does that mean everyone?
LAMPY
Every one touched by the curse.
Will runs from the room.
INT. HOUSE. LOUNGE - DAY
It’s worse than he thought.
His Mum and Dad have grown too and are now too big for the doll’s house. The trouble is they’re stuck.
Too big for the house, too small to escape.
Their voices are slightly deeper.
WILL’S DAD
Will. What are you up to? Get me and your Mum out of this house, immediately.
Lampy is sliding down the stairs on his bum.
WILL
What do I do?
LAMPY
To do what?
WILL
Make them smaller.
LAMPY
Do what you normally do, just do a bad deed.
WILL
Like what?
LAMPY
Sit on me.
WILL
Okay.
LAMPY
I was joking. Goodness don’t you big people have a sense of humour?
WILL
What then?
Will’s Mum’s head is stuck through a window.
WILL’S MUM
James, will you please hurry up. I have a pain in my neck.
Lampy starts laughing so hard that he falls off the last stair.
LAMPY
Her head’s in a window and she’s got a pain in the neck. Good one, Will’s Mum.
WILL
Get up Lampy and help me.
LAMPY
Why should I?
WILL
Because if you don’t help me, I will sit on you.
WILL’S MUM
William, I didn’t bring you up to sit on people.
EXT. GARDEN - DAY
Will is looking through the grass. Lampy is lying beside him.
LAMPY
What ya doing?
WILL
Shhh.
LAMPY
(whispering)
Well?
WILL
This.
Will dives out and captures the cat. Aunt Jemima has been chucked for being too big. She sits on the grass.
EXT. GARDEN - LATER
Will’s concentrating and we know this because his tongue is sticking out - again.
WILL
There.
The cat has a horse buggy attached to its collar. Jimmy is sitting in it.
WILL (CONT’D)
BOO!
The cat runs away pulling a terrified Jimmy into the bushes.
WILL (CONT’D)
Brilliant.
INT. DOLL’S HOUSE - EVENING.
Will’s Mum and Dad have shrunk again and have been returned to the doll’s house along with Jimmy and Aunt Jemima.
Jimmy and Aunt Jemima are traumatised.
WILL’S MUM
Goodness, what a day it’s been.
WILL’S DAD
Great Aunt Jemima looks a bit worse for wear.
WILL’S MUM
I must say, what with all this excitement, I’m starting to feel a bit peckish.
WILL’S DAD
I’m surprised that James hasn’t been banging on about food.
Jimmy is on another planet at the moment.
WILL’S DAD (CONT’D)
Maybe not. What are we going to do? It’s not like fairy tales. No one eats in fairy tales. No one gets hungry. I’m starving.
INT. HOUSE. LOUNGE - EVENING
Will is sitting on the stairs with Lampy.
WILL
I’m starving.
LAMPY
You’re hungry?
Will nods.
LAMPY (CONT’D)
Why didn’t you say so. I can make stuff.
WILL
What stuff?
LAMPY
Us trolls like to eat - what is it you big people call it?
WILL
Grass?
LAMPY
Manure.
WILL
Manure?
LAMPY
Lovely, it is. Grade A manure that you get around here, is the best. What do you normally do when you’re hungry?
WILL
Mum cooks my meals.
LAMPY
‘Mum cooks my meals’.
WILL
Well she does.
LAMPY
You are such a girl.
WILL
Am not.
LAMPY
So what are you going to do?
WILL
Be really, really good and get Mum back to the way she was.
LAMPY
But you’re only doing it for selfish reasons, so it doesn’t count.
WILL
You’re making these rules up.
LAMPY
It’s in the Big Book of Troll Rules. Honest.
WILL
So to get my Mum back, I’ve got to be good.
LAMPY
Yup.
WILL
That isn’t fair.
LAMPY
You flattened my cousin.
WILL
Are you ever going to let me forget that?
LAMPY
Nope. He was my only family around these parts.
WILL
So where are the rest of them?
LAMPY
Don’t know. Don’t care.
Lampy is almost sad.
WILL
So why are you crying?
LAMPY
Not.
WILL
Are too.
LAMPY
Shut up.
WILL
You shut up.
LAMPY
I said it first.
Will punches Lampy in the arm.
LAMPY (CONT’D)
That hurt.
Lampy storms off, out of the house.
WILL
Don’t care. I don’t need you , you stupid troll or my family.
INT. DOLL’S HOUSE - EVENING
Mum, Dad, Aunt Jemima and Jimmy are sitting around a table.
WILL’S DAD
I’m only going to ask you once James and I want you to be honest, have you got that box of matches on you?
JIMMY
Nope.
WILL’S MUM
Of course he hasn’t. Why would James carry matches?
WILL’S DAD
Well?
JIMMY
Why are you getting at me? It’s that little pig that got us into this.
WILL’S MUM
Language.
JIMMY
Well he is.
WILL’S DAD
I’m not going to punish you James but if we are to get any food, then we’ve got to attract your brother’s attention.
WILL’S MUM
And how are we going to do that?
Jimmy pulls the matches out of his pocket and lays them on the table.
JIMMY
I’ve got an idea, Dad. We burn the house down.
Jimmy looks smug thinking he’s guessed Dad’s intentions.
WILL’S MUM
James!
WILL’S DAD
Nearly son.
WILL’S MUM
Dad!
EXT. GARDEN - EVENING
Lampy is sitting in a huff.
Will comes out and stands behind him.
LAMPY
I know you’re there. Big people smell.
WILL
I don’t smell.
LAMPY
Suit yourself.
Will sits beside Lampy.
WILL
What are you going to do about Wilbur?
LAMPY
It’s a secret.
WILL
It’s just I would help you, if that’s okay?
LAMPY
It wouldn’t be a secret then.
WILL
Look,I’m sorry about Wilbur. It was an accident.
LAMPY
That’s what you say.
WILL
Don’t believe me then but I am sorry.
LAMPY
I can’t reverse the curse just ‘cause you’re sorry. That’s the rules. You’ve got to earn it.
WILL
But my Mum, my Dad they’ve got to work.
LAMPY
What’s work?
WILL
Grown ups go out and do things for other people and those people give them money.
LAMPY
Then what?
WILL
They spend it on me and my brother.
LAMPY
And what do you do in return?
WILL
Nothing, I’m their son.
LAMPY
Doesn’t sound fair to me. If I could find my family I would do things for them.
WILL
You are such a wuss.
Lampy has no idea what ‘a wuss’ is.
LAMPY
Thank you. By the way, is that smoke coming out of your house?
It sure is, Will runs into the house.
INT. HOUSE. LOUNGE - EVENING
There is smoke coming out of the doll’s house chimney.
Will panics.
INT. DOLL’S HOUSE - EVENING
Mum, Dad, Aunt Jemima and Jimmy are fanning the flames in the doll’s house fire place.
WILL’S DAD
That should do the trick.
JIMMY
Isn’t this doll’s house made of wood, Dad?
WILL’S DAD
Well spotted, James.
JIMMY
So isn’t there a chance that we could burn the thing down with us in it?
Dad thinks about this but he knows the answer already.
WILL’S DAD
Quick, find some water.
JIMMY
Where?
Suddenly a deluge of water soaks them all and puts the fire out.
INT. HOUSE. LOUNGE - EVENING
Will and Lampy are watching the doll’s house. Will has an empty jug in his hand.
WILL
That was a weird thing to do.
LAMPY
They wanted your attention.
WILL
How did you know that?
LAMPY
I can hear them, can’t you?
WILL
Not really.
(to the family)
What do you want?
Mum squeaks back.
LAMPY
They’re hungry. They want food.
WILL
I’m hungry.
LAMPY
Yeh but they’re little, you can give them some of that stuff that’s lying on the floor. And by the way,your
Mum says you’ll find some food in the other fridge in the garage.
INT. DOLL’S HOUSE - EVENING
Mum, Dad and Jemima are sitting eating large crumbs of food
WILL’S MUM
This is good.
JIMMY
Mine tastes funny, Like manure.
EXT. HOUSE. GARDEN - EVENING.
Will is sitting on the door step eating with Lampy.
LAMPY
Your food will run out soon.
WILL
So what do I do?
LAMPY
Go to work.
WILL
I’m ten. I’ve got to go to school after the holidays.
LAMPY
What are holidays?
WILL
When you don’t have any homework?
LAMPY
What’s homework?
WILL
Stop asking questions.
LAMPY
I’m nosey and you’re my friend. You did say you were my friend?
WILL
Yeh. I suppose so.
Lampy smiles the biggest smile. A good deed from Will.
WILL’S MUM (O.S.)
William, my head’s stuck in the window again.
Lampy and Will high five.
END OF EPISODE.
bobby stevenson 2013
